Martin Harris Needs a Planer-Thicknesser Fund

"Every great project starts with a flat board. Right now, Martin's boards—and spirits—are a bit wavy."

The Rough Truth

Any woodworker knows that the foundation of a great project is square, flat timber. For years, Martin has been battling rough-sawn wood with hand planes and sheer determination.

But as his projects get more ambitious, his workshop is missing one critical heart: A Planer-Thicknesser. This machine isn't just a luxury; it's the bridge between a rough plank and a masterpiece.

The Goal: Shaving down the costs

"The funds will go toward a stationary planer-thicknesser, allowing Martin to process reclaimed timber, reduce waste, and stop making tables that double as rocking chairs."

Common Concerns

Can't he just do this by hand?

Technically, yes. He can also churn his own butter and travel by horse and carriage, but the neighbours are starting to talk and his right bicep is now twice the size of his left. It's becoming a wardrobe issue.

What happens to the excess money?

It will be spent on a very expensive vacuum to hide the evidence of his woodworking hobby from the rest of the house. If there's still money left, we might buy him a chair so he can stare at the machine in silence.

Is he going to build me a free table?

Martin’s "friends and family" rate is currently 10% more than the market price, mainly due to the emotional labour of listening to your design ideas. But hey, at least the legs will be the same length this time.

Will this actually make him happy?

For approximately 15 minutes. Then he'll realise he needs a drum sander. It's a progressive disease, and we appreciate your help in enabling it.

£250 raised of £350 goal

71% Fund-o-meter 6 donors

Harris Boyz

Organizer • Ramsey, UK

Recent Support

Chip Hazard • £50

"Hurry up and buy it so I can stop hearing about it."

Sawyer Loggins • £20

"A small price to pay for a flat shelf."

Biff Plane • £100

"Buy a big one. Go on."

Common Concerns

Can't he just do this by hand?

Technically, yes. But his right bicep is becoming a wardrobe issue.

What happens to the excess money?

A very expensive vacuum to hide the evidence.